Alison Wem

What to Do When You’ve Lost Your Spark

There are times in life when the spark we once felt seems to dim. Motivation fades. Joy feels muted. Even things that once mattered can feel strangely distant. This doesn’t mean anything has gone wrong. Often, it simply means you have been living, adapting, carrying, and responding to more than you realise.

Losing your spark is not a personal failure. It is often a signal that something within you is tired, overstretched, or quietly asking for care rather than effort.

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When energy fades, it’s often a message

When life feels flat, it is easy to believe that energy must be chased or recreated. Yet more often, energy returns when we stop demanding it. The spark is not something that needs to be forced back into life. It is something that responds to attention, honesty, and gentle presence.

Sometimes the spark fades because you have outgrown an old way of being. Sometimes it dims because you have been meeting the needs of others for a long time without meeting your own. And sometimes it disappears simply because you are in a season that calls for rest rather than renewal.

Why pushing yourself rarely works

When motivation drops, many of us respond by pushing harder. We tell ourselves to be more disciplined, more positive, more committed. Yet this often deepens the sense of flatness rather than relieving it.

Reconnecting with your spark does not begin with effort. It begins with permission. Permission to feel flat without judgment. Permission to move more slowly. Permission to let joy return in its own time, rather than on demand.

How the spark begins to return

Often, the spark comes back quietly. It shows up as a moment of interest. A brief sense of curiosity. A feeling of relief when you stop pushing. These are not signs of weakness. They are signs that something alive within you is beginning to breathe again.

When you allow space instead of pressure, energy has somewhere to land. Not all at once, but steadily, in ways that feel sustainable rather than forced.

🌱 Practice for the week

Once this week, give yourself a few quiet minutes. Ask a simple question:
What feels draining right now? What feels even slightly nourishing?

You don’t need to act on the answer. Just notice it. Let the question open a little space without trying to resolve anything.

✨ Final reflection

You are not broken because your spark has faded. You are human. Energy ebbs and flows, just as life does. When you meet yourself with kindness rather than pressure, the spark often finds its way back. It’s not as a burst of excitement, but as a steady, honest warmth that can be trusted to grow again.

Looking for some more hints and tips on re-energising yourself? Try this